Swinging (A Haiku)
I have learned this year
the beauty of a hammock;
it can heal all wounds.
One year ago today I arrived in San Juan Ermita. After a typical problem-ridden Guatemalan bus ride that had forced a sleepover in Chiquimula with pizza and a Julia Roberts movie (poor me), I sat in my stuffy little room and wondered...what the hell do I do now? I find it incredibly...well, incredible. I sat in my house today and thought, 'it doesn't feel like a year.' Yes, I think about home and it seems like forever since I've been there. I think about how long it's been since I sat in a classroom or had to do homework. My life in Seattle feels like a lifetime ago.
But, at the same time, my life here feels like it's just starting. I'm just getting going, creating a routine, finding all the possibilities. I didn't understand how I could think both ways at once. It seems pretty impossible to feel like I've been gone forever and here for just a bit. I guess I've spent the last year in a sort of limbo. I'm good at adjusting, and I never imagined it would take a whole year to settle in here, but it really has. I have spent a lot of time feeling unproductive, but looking back, I'm pretty sure every little thing (no matter how frustrating or seemingly useless) was part of the process. And, I won't lie, it's been hard. Feeling unproductive and useless is one of the worst feelings there is.
A couple months ago, when this day started appearing on the horizon, I didn't really like thinking about being one year into my service. It made me a bit panicky to think that I was going to be half way done- didn't that mean I should have already gotten half of my work done? If that was true, I wasn't going to accomplish much in my service. I'm surprised to find, though, that now that this milestone has arrived, I am spending much more energy focused on my excitement for the future than worrying about the time already passed. I'm ready to start being pushy and take charge and make things happen.
In the mean time, I'll just keep "settling in". Every time the neighborhood kids knock on my door ("Hola, Doris!" they say each time. "My name is Alexandra," I tell them, always laughing. "We know, but we like to call you Doris Alexandra!" they giggle. I still haven't figured out why), or someone in town calls my name when I pass, or I need something and know exactly where to find it and how to get it, I know it's all the product of this past year. And, hopefully, it's all just been getting me ready for an exciting and fulfilling second year of service. Wish me luck~
"Bon Dieu! may I some day do something truly great. amen.” -E.E. Cummings
Monday, October 31, 2011
Picture Post
I know I've been awful about posting lately. Here are a few photos from the past month (and then some...)
mashing up berries for homemade wine
kayaking on lake atitlan
some of our training group at the lake
homemade apple pie during a visit from brynna
mashing up berries for homemade wine
kayaking on lake atitlan
some of our training group at the lake
homemade apple pie during a visit from brynna
Monday, September 12, 2011
But we can learn, like the trees, how to bend, how to sway
The Ride From Hell (and I really had to pee) (A Haiku)
Four hour bus ride turns
eight hour bus ride due to crash
on the road ahead.
There's been a request for me to do a post on elections, which were this past sunday (yes, they have elections on sunday here, weird, right?). Guatemala has elections once every four years, where citizens vote for pretty much everything. They receive 5 ballots: president, mayor, and their versions of senate/congress. Because of the high illiteracy rate in Guatemala, all ballots have pictures of the party symbols for each candidate. While Guatemala's government is set up a lot like ours in the US, a big difference is that there are twenty-some political parties here in Guatemala, each with its own set of candidates. These political parties often have strong rivalries with their opponents, and as a result fights, riots, and (occasionally) murders can occur.
I'm not quite sure what else to say about the whole thing, except that it got me evacuated from my site for the weekend. Because of the tendency for riots at voting centers, Peace Corps evacuated certain volunteers from their sites for the weekend (including all of us out in the East, since the machista residents on our side of the country tend to be pretty trigger-happy), just as a precaution. So, I spent five days with Wilson and the rest of the Guatemalan fam, and fellow PCV's Brynna and Carmen. While it was kind of a hassle dropping everything last minute in my site and relocating for a few days, it was nice to see the whole family (I hadn't seen them since May!), and for us volunteers it was kind of like a little vacation. We passed the time lying in bed watching E! TV (quite the treat, since none of us have televisions in site) and teaching ourselves how to juggle (be on the look out for upcoming tour dates of our dazzling juggling group "Check Out These Balls").
Juggling Practice
Wilson showing off his new soccer cleats
Election Night! So Exciting!
Luckily, my site's elections were apparently calm and I returned safe and sound to my little house VERY late (see haiku above) last night. Instead of trying to explain everything involved in the political scene here, I've found a couple articles that give a pretty good overview. Read if you like:
A good summary of the state of elections here
A bit about the candidates, and history
Women and politics in Guatemala
PS- Please, please, DON'T worry about my safety. While these articles do a pretty good job of explaining the violence and security problems in Guatemala, my little town is extremely calm and, unless I somehow get involved in drugs or try to run for office (neither of which I'm planning on), the only real crime I'm at risk for is being pick-pocketed. Of course, I'll knock on wood after saying that ;)
Four hour bus ride turns
eight hour bus ride due to crash
on the road ahead.
There's been a request for me to do a post on elections, which were this past sunday (yes, they have elections on sunday here, weird, right?). Guatemala has elections once every four years, where citizens vote for pretty much everything. They receive 5 ballots: president, mayor, and their versions of senate/congress. Because of the high illiteracy rate in Guatemala, all ballots have pictures of the party symbols for each candidate. While Guatemala's government is set up a lot like ours in the US, a big difference is that there are twenty-some political parties here in Guatemala, each with its own set of candidates. These political parties often have strong rivalries with their opponents, and as a result fights, riots, and (occasionally) murders can occur.
I'm not quite sure what else to say about the whole thing, except that it got me evacuated from my site for the weekend. Because of the tendency for riots at voting centers, Peace Corps evacuated certain volunteers from their sites for the weekend (including all of us out in the East, since the machista residents on our side of the country tend to be pretty trigger-happy), just as a precaution. So, I spent five days with Wilson and the rest of the Guatemalan fam, and fellow PCV's Brynna and Carmen. While it was kind of a hassle dropping everything last minute in my site and relocating for a few days, it was nice to see the whole family (I hadn't seen them since May!), and for us volunteers it was kind of like a little vacation. We passed the time lying in bed watching E! TV (quite the treat, since none of us have televisions in site) and teaching ourselves how to juggle (be on the look out for upcoming tour dates of our dazzling juggling group "Check Out These Balls").
Juggling Practice
Wilson showing off his new soccer cleats
Election Night! So Exciting!
Luckily, my site's elections were apparently calm and I returned safe and sound to my little house VERY late (see haiku above) last night. Instead of trying to explain everything involved in the political scene here, I've found a couple articles that give a pretty good overview. Read if you like:
A good summary of the state of elections here
A bit about the candidates, and history
Women and politics in Guatemala
PS- Please, please, DON'T worry about my safety. While these articles do a pretty good job of explaining the violence and security problems in Guatemala, my little town is extremely calm and, unless I somehow get involved in drugs or try to run for office (neither of which I'm planning on), the only real crime I'm at risk for is being pick-pocketed. Of course, I'll knock on wood after saying that ;)
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
So damn easy to say that life's so hard
Typical. (A Haiku)
Stove, without gas.
Buy the tank, cord, clamp, and all.
Now, gas, but no stove.
My mom always says, in a (half) joking way, of course, that the feminists ruined it for all of us. That, before they got all indignant, all women were expected to do was stay and home and bake. No long hours stuck in some stuffy office, no heavy lifting, no exhausting yard work. Sure, they had to clean the house, but they had all week to do that. I, being the product of a three-generation, all women household, tended to argue with her about it. I have always been one of those “indignant” feminists.
Guatemala has only recently found it’s feminist side. In fact, the majority of the population (both men and women) still thinks of feminism as a vigorous “down with men” type of attack on the male species. When you ask someone on the street what they think the word means, the most common answer is that it refers to people who think women are better than men.
Needless to say, the feminist movement here is in its VERY preliminary stages. It’s a success if you get a woman to vote. Yes, it drives me insane when we try to schedule a meeting and the women say they can’t come because they have to cook lunch for their husbands. I want to scream when my neighbor tells me she doesn’t travel anymore because her husband won’t let her. In fact, being in Guatemala has probably made me more of a feminist than I ever was back home (who knew it was possible?).
That being said, I have been enjoying the fringe benefits that come with the assumption that I am a weak, helpless woman; the convenient (albeit fairly chauvinistic) chivalry that accompanies the machismo. It’s kind of nice that the bus guys carry my groceries for me, and that I can get a guy to let me have the front seat on the ride home. I appreciate not being expected to carry the heavy floor mats from the meeting hall to the office.
Granted, I would never trade these little conveniences for the undoubtedly more valuable rights and privileges I am afforded as an American woman. I am constantly finding new things to be thankful for- that I never had to question whether I would attend high school or not, that I was never expected to serve the men and boys lunch before I ate, that I got to play sports and other activities after school instead of having to go home and clean the house. But, I must say that when I have a huge jug of water and an even huger hill to climb, and a man comes along and carries it home for me without hesitation, I do have to briefly agree with my old fashioned mother.
Now, if we could only create a future where the death of chauvinism does not equal the death of chivalry… But, we can’t always have it all, can we?
Stove, without gas.
Buy the tank, cord, clamp, and all.
Now, gas, but no stove.
My mom always says, in a (half) joking way, of course, that the feminists ruined it for all of us. That, before they got all indignant, all women were expected to do was stay and home and bake. No long hours stuck in some stuffy office, no heavy lifting, no exhausting yard work. Sure, they had to clean the house, but they had all week to do that. I, being the product of a three-generation, all women household, tended to argue with her about it. I have always been one of those “indignant” feminists.
Guatemala has only recently found it’s feminist side. In fact, the majority of the population (both men and women) still thinks of feminism as a vigorous “down with men” type of attack on the male species. When you ask someone on the street what they think the word means, the most common answer is that it refers to people who think women are better than men.
Needless to say, the feminist movement here is in its VERY preliminary stages. It’s a success if you get a woman to vote. Yes, it drives me insane when we try to schedule a meeting and the women say they can’t come because they have to cook lunch for their husbands. I want to scream when my neighbor tells me she doesn’t travel anymore because her husband won’t let her. In fact, being in Guatemala has probably made me more of a feminist than I ever was back home (who knew it was possible?).
That being said, I have been enjoying the fringe benefits that come with the assumption that I am a weak, helpless woman; the convenient (albeit fairly chauvinistic) chivalry that accompanies the machismo. It’s kind of nice that the bus guys carry my groceries for me, and that I can get a guy to let me have the front seat on the ride home. I appreciate not being expected to carry the heavy floor mats from the meeting hall to the office.
Granted, I would never trade these little conveniences for the undoubtedly more valuable rights and privileges I am afforded as an American woman. I am constantly finding new things to be thankful for- that I never had to question whether I would attend high school or not, that I was never expected to serve the men and boys lunch before I ate, that I got to play sports and other activities after school instead of having to go home and clean the house. But, I must say that when I have a huge jug of water and an even huger hill to climb, and a man comes along and carries it home for me without hesitation, I do have to briefly agree with my old fashioned mother.
Now, if we could only create a future where the death of chauvinism does not equal the death of chivalry… But, we can’t always have it all, can we?
Sunday, August 21, 2011
Everything still looks the same but it's me that feels the strangest
Love Letter (A Haiku)
Dear Toaster Oven,
I never thought I could love
an appliance so.
I know, I know, it's been oh so long since my last post, and I'm oh so sorry. To be honest, it's been so long I'm not even quite sure where to start. It's been a pretty jam packed month and a half. And I'm not gonna lie, it's been a bit of a rough patch. I think I've hit the Peace Corps version of a "sophomore slump", or something. I've been in country a year (Official "Guateversary" celebration on August 11th, woo hoo!), so things here aren't particularly new and exciting anymore. But, at the same time, I still don't fit in, and I still usually don't have any idea what the heck I'm doing. I don't feel like I'm doing anything, but things are happening all the time. So, apologies if this post winds up being a scattered jumble of randomness, but I have a feeling that's what it might be, since that seems to be the way of life lately.
The highlight of my randomly jumbled life has certainly been the visit from my (favorite) Aunt Su-B over my birthday weekend. It was great to spend a few days with her (especially since it meant staying in "luxurious" hotels with cable TV and hot showers- what a life!) and show her around Antigua and Lake Atitlan. We spent my birthday at Chichicastenango, which is a town in the Northern Highlands of Guatemala where there is a huge market (it literally took us the entire day to walk through it). Throughout the trip, Su-B couldn't help but talk with anyone and everyone in sight, which meant we were always being followed by people trying to sell us stuff (and usually a few dogs, too), and I think she bought one of everything in the entire country. But, I would have expected nothing less of her and, with the exception of the hundred or so oozing bug bites I somehow wound up with, the trip was a great little vacation, and a nice little comfort from home.
Other notable moments have included a trip to fellow PCV Carmen's site in Santa Cruz Naranjo, Santa Rosa to talk to her youth groups about life in the States, a workshop at the Peace Corps office which, happily, coincided with our 1 year mark in country, and a day trip with some of my San Juan neighbors to a river for a picnic and a swim.
As unproductive as I have felt in my work, I have noticed that more people know me in site, and notice when I've been gone. It's the little things, like the kids in town calling my name every time I pass them, that keep me going.
Su-B buying up the entire country
PCVs Allie, Brynna, and me with one of Carmen's youth groups
Day trip to Las Ventanas, a cute little spot in on of San Juan's aldeas
Dear Toaster Oven,
I never thought I could love
an appliance so.
I know, I know, it's been oh so long since my last post, and I'm oh so sorry. To be honest, it's been so long I'm not even quite sure where to start. It's been a pretty jam packed month and a half. And I'm not gonna lie, it's been a bit of a rough patch. I think I've hit the Peace Corps version of a "sophomore slump", or something. I've been in country a year (Official "Guateversary" celebration on August 11th, woo hoo!), so things here aren't particularly new and exciting anymore. But, at the same time, I still don't fit in, and I still usually don't have any idea what the heck I'm doing. I don't feel like I'm doing anything, but things are happening all the time. So, apologies if this post winds up being a scattered jumble of randomness, but I have a feeling that's what it might be, since that seems to be the way of life lately.
The highlight of my randomly jumbled life has certainly been the visit from my (favorite) Aunt Su-B over my birthday weekend. It was great to spend a few days with her (especially since it meant staying in "luxurious" hotels with cable TV and hot showers- what a life!) and show her around Antigua and Lake Atitlan. We spent my birthday at Chichicastenango, which is a town in the Northern Highlands of Guatemala where there is a huge market (it literally took us the entire day to walk through it). Throughout the trip, Su-B couldn't help but talk with anyone and everyone in sight, which meant we were always being followed by people trying to sell us stuff (and usually a few dogs, too), and I think she bought one of everything in the entire country. But, I would have expected nothing less of her and, with the exception of the hundred or so oozing bug bites I somehow wound up with, the trip was a great little vacation, and a nice little comfort from home.
Other notable moments have included a trip to fellow PCV Carmen's site in Santa Cruz Naranjo, Santa Rosa to talk to her youth groups about life in the States, a workshop at the Peace Corps office which, happily, coincided with our 1 year mark in country, and a day trip with some of my San Juan neighbors to a river for a picnic and a swim.
As unproductive as I have felt in my work, I have noticed that more people know me in site, and notice when I've been gone. It's the little things, like the kids in town calling my name every time I pass them, that keep me going.
Su-B buying up the entire country
PCVs Allie, Brynna, and me with one of Carmen's youth groups
Day trip to Las Ventanas, a cute little spot in on of San Juan's aldeas
Monday, July 25, 2011
Thursday, July 7, 2011
I Thank God For My Life, And The Stars And Stripes
Along came a spider (A Haiku)
Walk into the room...
Holy crap- tarantula!
Shit. Ohshitohshit.
I am not a sissy girl. Bugs don't freak me out. In college I was the one my friends called into their rooms to kill the spiders. But, tarantulas are where I draw the line. Tarantulas are not bugs. They're not spiders. They're MONSTERS.
Now, when I think about it, it's probably a funny story. I had just cleaned my pila (literally climbed inside my pila and scrubbed it) and I was disgustingly sweaty. Trying to take advantage of the running water, which usually only lasts for an hour or so in the afternoon, I quickly jumped into the shower straight out of the pila. Thus, when I got out I had no towel and no clothes to put on (yet another beautiful thing about living alone...). So, i dripped dripped dripped nakedly through my house into my room, went to reach for my towel, and came face to face (almost touched) a huge, furry, fanged MONSTER.
After a good, long string of curse words in both english and spanish, I promptly did the only thing I could think of... I called my mommy. She was the exact appropriate combination of appalled and amused, and (after concurring that I probably didn't want to try to kill it- think of the smushing sound and the guts! gross.) she very patiently waited on the phone as I put on rubber gloves and shoes (and, still, nothing else- I was not about to put on clothes and lose track of that thing in the process), gathered a box and yogurt container, squealed a bit more, and then somehow, not so gracefully, scooped the monster into my trap. After more squealing (and probably more cursing) I managed to get myself clothed and carry the whole contraption (tarantula enclosed) out of my house and far, FAR away, where I then chucked the whole thing with as much force as possible and RAN back to the house. Phew.
Really, it's not THAT exciting- most Peace Corps volunteers will run into a tarantula at least once in their service. But I figured I would share so at least there could be some entertainment from the whole event. Also, I would just like to say, Thank God for mosquito nets, otherwise I would never sleep again.
Okay, moving on. Until yesterday's traumatic tarantula extravaganza, this post was going to be about the Fourth of July. I guess Guatemala is changing me a lot more than I think, because not only have I become the girl freaking out about the spider in her room, I've also apparently become the proud, patriotic American. I've never been a fan of Independence Day, and I've never really considered myself proud to be an American. I'm still not particularly proud. It's not like I did anything to be proud of- I just happened to be born in the United States. But living in a third world country has certainly made me appreciate my country more, and spend more time being grateful for its blessings than critical of its shortcomings.
I don't know if it was due to this newfound patriotism, or simply the combination of good company, cheap drinks, and fun costumes, but this was by far my favorite Fourth of July. There was a big celebration for all the volunteers, including a bake-off, raffle (I won a smoothie AND some shampoo- score!), talent show, barbeque (with veggie burgers), and plenty of red, white, and blue. I spent way too much money, and ate WAY too much food, but what better way to celebrate America than to be a little self-indulgent, right?
Happy Fourth of July from Guatemala!
Walk into the room...
Holy crap- tarantula!
Shit. Ohshitohshit.
I am not a sissy girl. Bugs don't freak me out. In college I was the one my friends called into their rooms to kill the spiders. But, tarantulas are where I draw the line. Tarantulas are not bugs. They're not spiders. They're MONSTERS.
Now, when I think about it, it's probably a funny story. I had just cleaned my pila (literally climbed inside my pila and scrubbed it) and I was disgustingly sweaty. Trying to take advantage of the running water, which usually only lasts for an hour or so in the afternoon, I quickly jumped into the shower straight out of the pila. Thus, when I got out I had no towel and no clothes to put on (yet another beautiful thing about living alone...). So, i dripped dripped dripped nakedly through my house into my room, went to reach for my towel, and came face to face (almost touched) a huge, furry, fanged MONSTER.
After a good, long string of curse words in both english and spanish, I promptly did the only thing I could think of... I called my mommy. She was the exact appropriate combination of appalled and amused, and (after concurring that I probably didn't want to try to kill it- think of the smushing sound and the guts! gross.) she very patiently waited on the phone as I put on rubber gloves and shoes (and, still, nothing else- I was not about to put on clothes and lose track of that thing in the process), gathered a box and yogurt container, squealed a bit more, and then somehow, not so gracefully, scooped the monster into my trap. After more squealing (and probably more cursing) I managed to get myself clothed and carry the whole contraption (tarantula enclosed) out of my house and far, FAR away, where I then chucked the whole thing with as much force as possible and RAN back to the house. Phew.Really, it's not THAT exciting- most Peace Corps volunteers will run into a tarantula at least once in their service. But I figured I would share so at least there could be some entertainment from the whole event. Also, I would just like to say, Thank God for mosquito nets, otherwise I would never sleep again.
Okay, moving on. Until yesterday's traumatic tarantula extravaganza, this post was going to be about the Fourth of July. I guess Guatemala is changing me a lot more than I think, because not only have I become the girl freaking out about the spider in her room, I've also apparently become the proud, patriotic American. I've never been a fan of Independence Day, and I've never really considered myself proud to be an American. I'm still not particularly proud. It's not like I did anything to be proud of- I just happened to be born in the United States. But living in a third world country has certainly made me appreciate my country more, and spend more time being grateful for its blessings than critical of its shortcomings.
I don't know if it was due to this newfound patriotism, or simply the combination of good company, cheap drinks, and fun costumes, but this was by far my favorite Fourth of July. There was a big celebration for all the volunteers, including a bake-off, raffle (I won a smoothie AND some shampoo- score!), talent show, barbeque (with veggie burgers), and plenty of red, white, and blue. I spent way too much money, and ate WAY too much food, but what better way to celebrate America than to be a little self-indulgent, right?
Happy Fourth of July from Guatemala!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)